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The Quiet After the Storm
Building Peace Amid Chaos
In the last year, I found myself struggling and overwhelmed. When I was a kid, I grew up in a chaotic household, and I got so used to the chaos that I learned to live like that in my early adult years. It may have even been a contributing factor to my substance use.
Life changed for me after I joined the service. That was the first time I was away from home and alone. I would go home to visit and feel overwhelmed by the chaos.
In my household, everyone was loud and boisterous and constantly interrupting each other. We also had a lot of mental illnesses going untreated because mental health was not discussed then like it is now.
So, returning to that after having some semblance of structure, toning down my flaws, and forgetting about that addiction to chaos, I could hardly function around it. It got to where I spent less time at home throughout my service time when I had a vacation.
When I was discharged, I went home for a few weeks while waiting to move into an apartment, and the chaos was right back in my face again. Eventually, I moved and found my way, maintaining a peaceful environment.
But sometimes, even though I have some distance from the chaos that still very much hangs around my family roots, it seeps into my life. I…